Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Ubermas Greetings from Octavius Fong and the Roaming Eye of Doom
The Season of Darkness has fallen. Villains celebrate the Ubermas Traditions: Opulence. Taking pride and joy in the success your hard work has earned for you. Let others be humble. We Are Villains!
Sinister Ubermas Everyone!
-Lord Malignance
Saturday, December 1, 2012
Ubermas 2012
Greetings and Dark Joys of the Unholiday Season,
As legend holds, long ago through many years, the traditions of Ubermas have been passed down, Villain to Villain, group to group, conclave to conclave. Though there have been many Epic Tales and Paeans written that have hidden and secret meanings far too Malevolent to reveal to readers, One will share this first with you now, with a treat for your appreciation at the end.
Long ago, so long as to almost be forgotten, Villainy assembled in a hidden stronghold, and conspired to unleash an idea of Evil greater than any other; An idea putting forth the creation of an Unholiday of Greed, and Pride, and Selling Out. This most fell of unholidays would be accompanied with Opulence, Feasts, Bragging, the Darkgod Krelm, Skullian Pranks, and unknowable rituals. It would put into stark contrast the Holidays you know, and their reflection in Evil.
But there, in the darkness, where Villains worked their Evil, a concern arose.
Who would determine the exact Date of Ubermas each year?
The turmoil in the Cabal shook the halls of power. Some Villains thought one day, and others another. No consensus could be found. And so, as Villains will, a terrible and bloody war broke out, and many minions were E-Liminated. Powers accumulated were squandered in warfare. Influence waned as Villains would All go To-The-Limit to achieve Ultimate Victory, and the vanquishment of their foes.
But Villains don't vanquish easily, and so the war raged, and ravaged the world of Evil.
Until...
Villains, their daggers drawn, placed firmly on the backs of each other, hearts targeted for crushing, came to the First Tradition of Ubermas.
Since no date could be set without Villains disagreeing, then Ubermas would begin on the day in December, when the first Villain in Evil Standing declared that it would.
The declaration must be public, and as Villains are wont to, must be made with the Authority only a Villain can carry. A Villain does not Ask when their Will will be fulfilled. A Villain simply Tells.
And so, this year, the First Villain in Evil Standing to Declare the Season of Darkness to have fallen upon us is the Overlord.
Follow Overlord on her webpage;
www.minionstew.com
Sinister Ubermas Everyone !
-Lord Malignance
Dire Ruler of the Colorado Holdfast
As legend holds, long ago through many years, the traditions of Ubermas have been passed down, Villain to Villain, group to group, conclave to conclave. Though there have been many Epic Tales and Paeans written that have hidden and secret meanings far too Malevolent to reveal to readers, One will share this first with you now, with a treat for your appreciation at the end.
Long ago, so long as to almost be forgotten, Villainy assembled in a hidden stronghold, and conspired to unleash an idea of Evil greater than any other; An idea putting forth the creation of an Unholiday of Greed, and Pride, and Selling Out. This most fell of unholidays would be accompanied with Opulence, Feasts, Bragging, the Darkgod Krelm, Skullian Pranks, and unknowable rituals. It would put into stark contrast the Holidays you know, and their reflection in Evil.
But there, in the darkness, where Villains worked their Evil, a concern arose.
Who would determine the exact Date of Ubermas each year?
The turmoil in the Cabal shook the halls of power. Some Villains thought one day, and others another. No consensus could be found. And so, as Villains will, a terrible and bloody war broke out, and many minions were E-Liminated. Powers accumulated were squandered in warfare. Influence waned as Villains would All go To-The-Limit to achieve Ultimate Victory, and the vanquishment of their foes.
But Villains don't vanquish easily, and so the war raged, and ravaged the world of Evil.
Until...
Villains, their daggers drawn, placed firmly on the backs of each other, hearts targeted for crushing, came to the First Tradition of Ubermas.
Since no date could be set without Villains disagreeing, then Ubermas would begin on the day in December, when the first Villain in Evil Standing declared that it would.
The declaration must be public, and as Villains are wont to, must be made with the Authority only a Villain can carry. A Villain does not Ask when their Will will be fulfilled. A Villain simply Tells.
And so, this year, the First Villain in Evil Standing to Declare the Season of Darkness to have fallen upon us is the Overlord.
Follow Overlord on her webpage;
www.minionstew.com
Sinister Ubermas Everyone !
-Lord Malignance
Dire Ruler of the Colorado Holdfast
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
GrandMaster Calamity's SuperVillain Challenge 2012
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| Source: http://www.ealinggazette.co.uk/ealing-news/local-ealing-news/2011/02/18/figure-in-the-fog-earns-photographer-a-prize-64767-28195068/ |
Greetings and Lamentations, I AM Lord Malignance, and you Will Crouch! before me Now.
(Villains excepted, of course)
Today, Halloween, is the day we recognize the Oldest Tradition in Villainy, and remember the lesson of the Villain who gave it to us.
Four years ago, the Great and Unknown Villain GrandMaster Calamity challenged Villains to go out and take a picture of yourself out in the world in costume, to inspire Villains with your boldness and creativity.
This became the GrandMaster Calamity's SuperVillain Challenge.
This year, due to squabbles, One didn't announce this in advance, but squabbles aside, the Tradition is remembered and upheld in respect to the Villain, to our Culture of Villainy, and to the Memory and Lesson of GrandMaster Calamity. He taught us that we should always be able to walk away from what we create online. And he demonstrated his conviction to that belief by walking away. He remains today as much of a mystery as he has always been. Unknown, unknowable, and Legend within the Villainous community.
Some of the previous years contests, and winners;
Year 3
Winner: Colorado's own Nagneto
Year 2
Winner: Malvado
Year 1
Winner: Agent Beryllium, Fatal Phylo, and the Aluminum Chef.
One has never won this award though, but One does try.
-Lord Malignance
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Firebombing Kaptain Blackheart
One has been away for awhile attending to business, and getting up to mischief in Facebook. The Third Malignopalooza is coming on August 1st, and One still has to reach 1000 posts by that day. Expect quite a few posts shortly...
-Lord Malignance
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Enter the Villain: Rex Velvet
Villain Calling Out Phoenix Jones Might be Least of His Problems
Am I really reporting on this? Don’t worry, there is an even more shocking accusation further down. So this time around, the internet has deemed this “newsworthy?” Okay, here we go. I am sure you have probably heard of Seattle crime fighter, Phoenix Jones. Phoenix seems to be a very polarizing figure in the Real Life Superhero movement. People seem to either love Phoenix, or strongly disapprove of him. I have met Phoenix Jones many times, and he has always been nothing but nice to me. Jones, his wife, “Purple Reign,” and the Rain City Superhero Movement try to do good around the city, and have even gone as far as to start a charity to raise awareness about domestic violence. Their first major fund raising event is actually scheduled for Saturday May, 12th (tickets are still available) here in Seattle (see the full story here) and check outhttp://www.purplereigncampaign.org/.
But despite the good intentions, some people openly despise Jones. A new video has been let loose on the world, announcing the rise of a new “super villain,” who goes by the moniker of “Rex Velvet,” and who is definitely not a fan of Phoenix Jones. See his video below.
It seems that the Rex Velvet video is really more of a tongue-in-cheek piece of performance art, rather than a real rivalry. The entire thing is rather ludicrous, yet amusing. Apparently, Rex Velvet has been harassing Phoenix via social networks– to the degree that Phoenix even requested that his fans report this antagonist’s Facebook page. So with the release of the video, the geek news feeds are all atwitter about this new rivalry; but is this the first time Jones has been challenged by a self-proclaimed “super villain?”
The answer is “no.” In January of 2011, another video was posted by a villain calling himself “Dark Sin.” Without the attention generated by Phoenix Jones publicly acknowledging him, Dark Sin quickly faded from memory. His video on YouTube has a whopping 268 views as of this writing. You can check it out below.
So why has Rex Velvet garnered so much attention where others have failed? As I mentioned before, Phoenix Jones made the mistake of publicly acknowledging his existence. Factor this in with the fact that after receiving wide publicity following his arrest (no charges were filed) stemming from an unfortunate altercation during one of his nighttime patrols, and subsequent public unmasking, Jones has received quite a bit of national and international attention– which attracts those looking to steal some of his thunder, presumably people like Rex Velvet. To be fair, Rex Velvet also has a much better video than Dark Sin had. Rex Velvet’s video demand that Jones unmask himself, makes it obvious that he isn’t serious enough to know much about Phoenix. Jones has already been unmasked long ago, and is often seen without his mask on live patrol Ustreams, during the Rain City Superhero Movement’s pre-patrol meet ups.
So starts a new chapter in the Phoenix Jones saga. Any visions fans might have of heroes running around the city and outwitting nefarious villains at every turn, seem fanciful when the reality of the situation is little more than a high tech flame war and attention seeking. But hey, at least it’s entertaining. In the meantime, be sure to follow the situation via Phoenix Jones’ Twitter and Facebook feeds, as well as Rex Velvet’s respective Twitter and Facebook posts.
However, a super villain rival might be the least of Phoenix Jones’ problems. Today in Seattle, mayhem broke out on the streets, as a group of individuals used the cover of a May Day General Strike protest to surge through the city, and smashed the windows of businesses like NikeTown and American Apparel, as well as those of random cars. Jones was at this event, and local weekly paper, The Stranger, is reporting on their Slog (blog), that someone is claiming they were pepper sprayed by Phoenix Jones during today’s stupidity. The Stranger’s Cienna Madrid says in the following statement:
”I ran into Slog commenter Baconcat, who was pepper sprayed by Phoenix Jones.Baconcat was taking pictures at the courthouse and Phoenix was screaming at the group, ‘I’m not against you guys, I’m here to keep the peace and protect this historic building,’ and then took them out with pepper spray. Baconcat says his eyes are dry as hell. Tear gas went off shortly thereafter; it’s unknown if the tear gas belongs to the ‘superhero,’ too. ‘Beware: Phoenix Jones is still on the loose. But it’s still peaceful here in Westlake.’”
Phoenix Jones responded via his Twitter account:“I NEVER PEPPER SPRAYED ANYONE I DID GET SPRAYED BY ANARCHIST ‘PROTESTER’ OCCUPY IS OK BUT [riots] ARE NOT”
Purple Reign backed this statement up via her own Twitter account:
“For those following protests & riots downtown Seattle @ThePhoenixJones is there helping & despite false rumors has NOT pepper sprayed anyone”
Could this new villain already be putting into motion some devious plan to tarnish Phoenix Jones credibility? This might be a hard accusation to deny when the local news is running footage of someone in the vicinity of Jones clearly spraying pepper spray in an effort to defend a federal building from violent protesters. Has the world gone mad? After today’s events, the answers to these questions are a resounding “maybe.” Expect Phoenix Jones to be a popular news item for the next few days.
UPDATE: Shortly after this post went live, Phoenix Jones posted the following comment through his Facebook page, exactly as it was posted:
“YOU WANNA KNOW MY STANCE ON OCCUPY HERE YOU GO. I DON’T CARE IF PEOPLE WANNA PROTEST IT IS YOUR RIGHT AS AN AMERICAN I AGREE SMALL BUSINESSES ARE BEING DESTROYED BY CORPORATIONS. TODAY THE PROBLEM WAS NOT THE PROTESTERS OR THE OCCUPY MOVEMENT.
IT WAS A SMALL GROUP OF BLACK WATER ANARCHISTS THAT HAD MADE OPEN THREATS TO TRY AND DESTROY KEY BUILDINGS IN MY CITY. IT IS RIDICULOUS AND AGAINST EVERYTHING I STAND FOR TO WATCH PEOPLE PURPOSELY COMMIT ACTS OF TERROR, VIOLENCE, AND MAYHEM.
SO WHERE DO I STAND? I STAND SIDE BY SIDE WITH ANYONE WHO UPHOLDS JUSTICE AND FACE TO FACE WITH ANYONE WHO WANTS TO COMMIT VIOLENT FELONIES (i did not pepper-spray anyone, my whole video will be up soon…but if any of the anarchists have a problem with being pepper-sprayed you should probably stop attacking and breaking into federal buildings).”
Tags: Charity, Cienna Madrid, comicbooked.com, Dark Sin, General Strike, May Day, news, pepper spray, Phoenix Jones, protests, Purple Reign, Rain City Superhero Movement, RCSM, Real Life Superheroes, Rex Velvet, riots, RLSH, Robb Orr, Seattle, super villain, The Stranger
About the Author
Written by Robb Orr
Robb Orr is a comic bibliophile and game aficionado from the “Emerald City” of Seattle, WA. He hopes to win enough favor to gain pet status after the upcoming and inevitable monkey apocalypse comes to fruition.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Villain Team Up? What could be there plan OTHER than Total World Domination ?!
Courtesy of Professor Magnus Obsidian with a Guest Appearance by none other than Agent Wraith! A Villain team up?! What could two of the most Diabolical Geniuses have in store for the World?
-Lord Malignance
Some of my favorite parts;
1) The Skull Phone - Of Course! How else would you contact a ghost on a Space Station.
2) The payoff; Acting, Comedy, and Entertainment.
3) The Metafiction of the Damocles and it's respected history. Plus, the added depth of it being a 1960s technological relic, and yet Still, 20 years ahead of our time. The Music !
Respect as always to the Potentate, creator of the Damocles, and it is One's understanding, allows through his continued generosity, the MetaFictional property to be used.
Victory for Villainy !
-Lord Malignance
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
The Accounting and the Great Shadow 2012
Greetings and Lamentations, I AM Lord Malignance, and you WILL Crouch! before me Now,
(Villains excepted of course)
The Accounting is here, and One will now travel for a month or so around my Colorado Holdfast, looking to receive tribute for my Great and many services to those under My iron rule. While away, comment moderation is on - One hates it, but after last year's mischief, it hardly seems wise to leave that door open a second time. Facebook account is deactivated, but if you WANT to call me names, you can critique the YouTube Videos. Hint: The earliest, incredibly, are far worse than the newer ones.
In my absence, the Great Shadow of One's influence recedes with me, and opportunities for villains to rise and be found worthy in the eyes of peers, presents itself. This year RLSV - reflections of the RLSH are about, looking for ways to earn recognition for their creating names and Facebook accounts. Wildtards are flopping around like fish on a sidewalk. Groups are out there, looking for ways to do anything.
One wishes them success, to the greater glory and sustainability of Villainy.
To the Minions and Henchmen, in One's employ, One will be seeing you soon. To my friends in Villainy, One wishes you success and safety. And happiness! And Fun! If you aren't having fun, then One suggests you stage your own Accounting. Find time to touch the things that matter to you. Cherish them, and enjoy them (and you know, take them, own them, and Rule them without pity or remorse).
A dead shot of ~200 posts to Malignopalooza3 in August, so save up for your Cognac now.
This isn't goodbye, it's
"One WILL RULE the WORLD, and Enslave ALL humanity, all too soon enough".
-Lord Malignance
Tyrant, and Dire Ruler of the Colorado Holdfast
February 29th, 2012
(Leap Day!)
And you may Rise.
To the Reality Show One has apparently signed up for; One is still waiting for that to appear somewhere. Anywhere.
(Villains excepted of course)
The Accounting is here, and One will now travel for a month or so around my Colorado Holdfast, looking to receive tribute for my Great and many services to those under My iron rule. While away, comment moderation is on - One hates it, but after last year's mischief, it hardly seems wise to leave that door open a second time. Facebook account is deactivated, but if you WANT to call me names, you can critique the YouTube Videos. Hint: The earliest, incredibly, are far worse than the newer ones.
In my absence, the Great Shadow of One's influence recedes with me, and opportunities for villains to rise and be found worthy in the eyes of peers, presents itself. This year RLSV - reflections of the RLSH are about, looking for ways to earn recognition for their creating names and Facebook accounts. Wildtards are flopping around like fish on a sidewalk. Groups are out there, looking for ways to do anything.
One wishes them success, to the greater glory and sustainability of Villainy.
To the Minions and Henchmen, in One's employ, One will be seeing you soon. To my friends in Villainy, One wishes you success and safety. And happiness! And Fun! If you aren't having fun, then One suggests you stage your own Accounting. Find time to touch the things that matter to you. Cherish them, and enjoy them (and you know, take them, own them, and Rule them without pity or remorse).
A dead shot of ~200 posts to Malignopalooza3 in August, so save up for your Cognac now.
This isn't goodbye, it's
"One WILL RULE the WORLD, and Enslave ALL humanity, all too soon enough".
-Lord Malignance
Tyrant, and Dire Ruler of the Colorado Holdfast
February 29th, 2012
(Leap Day!)
And you may Rise.
To the Reality Show One has apparently signed up for; One is still waiting for that to appear somewhere. Anywhere.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
The Mighty Colorado Holdfast
Resources for your Visit to Colorado, or general appreciation for our "Centennial State".
(Work in Progress - One wanted the place holder to add to later).
Places to See, when visiting Colorado
Place
Dude Ranches
Tarryall River Ranch
Made in Colorado
Colorado Boomerangs the Finest outside of Australia.
Last Updated 02/24/12
(Work in Progress - One wanted the place holder to add to later).
Places to See, when visiting Colorado
Place
Dude Ranches
Tarryall River Ranch
Made in Colorado
Colorado Boomerangs the Finest outside of Australia.
Last Updated 02/24/12
Friday, January 20, 2012
Ubermas 2012 Pictures
Greetings and Lamentations, I AM Lord Malignance, and you WILL Crouch! before me Now!
(Villains excepted, of course)
The Lair is a shambles, but what could anyone expect from the month long unholiday Villains share, called Ubermas? The Season of Evil, where Excess, Opulence, Selling Out, and the Benefits of Hard Work the Year Long, are celebrated, and Evil company is cherished and enjoyed.
Some highlights from Ubermas 2011;
One hopes all Villains had the best unholiday of Ubermas you could. The Next Year is just another short 11months away. Time enough for your liver to heal, and to make yourself even more successful and happy than you have been previously. To Success!
-Lord Malignance
(Did not see the Spectral Appearance of Madame Lucrezia Borgia this year in any mirrors, and the brandy by the sub basement trapdoor was left untouched. Perhaps One was unworthy, or did not Celebrate Hard Enough?) Perhaps next year.
(Villains excepted, of course)
The Lair is a shambles, but what could anyone expect from the month long unholiday Villains share, called Ubermas? The Season of Evil, where Excess, Opulence, Selling Out, and the Benefits of Hard Work the Year Long, are celebrated, and Evil company is cherished and enjoyed.
Some highlights from Ubermas 2011;
 |
| Ubermas Tribute feted Oneself by the Minion in Training, Diabolical Madame X |
 |
| Meeting with the Colorado Camorra. Seriously, you can NOT do business unsuitably coiffed. |
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| Greetings Fuel for the Colorado Mafiya. (Note the Bison Meat? - It's how you can tell this is Colorado) |
 |
| A long time ago gift from the Cartel Interests in my Colorado Holdfast. It tastes like Butterscotch and Lighter Fluid. |
 |
| Sushi Den in Denver. Representatives from the 3 Clans are there lurking. I can't see them either. |
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| Evil Snow. It doesn't land on the ground, because it's being omni directionally blown from all angles. |
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| Regular Snow |
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| Picture from Fall. The first sign, Winter was coming. You can almost make out the Lair in this picture. You can also, almost make out the (unsuccessful) inbound missile strike. Silly Europeans. My Neighbors are N.O.R.A.D. |
One hopes all Villains had the best unholiday of Ubermas you could. The Next Year is just another short 11months away. Time enough for your liver to heal, and to make yourself even more successful and happy than you have been previously. To Success!
-Lord Malignance
(Did not see the Spectral Appearance of Madame Lucrezia Borgia this year in any mirrors, and the brandy by the sub basement trapdoor was left untouched. Perhaps One was unworthy, or did not Celebrate Hard Enough?) Perhaps next year.
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