Pushing towards the Enslavement of all Mankind

Greetings and Lamentations, I AM Lord Malignance, and I have Returned,

A villainous thank you, to all for their kind and Evil thoughts. The Accounting is done, but for analysis, which will take some time to complete. Some preliminary findings for your review;

Amazon.com is waging war on my Colorado Holdfast. One enjoys the many services of Amazon, and so, has chosen to allow this affront to my dominion. The greater argument to win is that the Internet is Free, and therefore Evil, and should remain so. This shall be resolved to ones satisfaction shortly.

Searching for the superhero infestation in my domain, one experienced two unique moments;
1) While searching “Mountain Towns” for Wallcreeper, Windowpeeper, or any combination of similar words, one found an opportunity to enjoy snowy activities. Being a helmeted megalomaniac who yells at everyone was completely accepted as normal in the skiing communities. The assumption being that one was “shredding” turning out to be a fortuitous cover for my sinister activities. No one has heard of ‘ole Creepy’, so his activities may be more covert.

2) One searched the Hive of Villainy known colloquially as “Colfax Avenue” for evidence of Zen Blade harassing my interests, and no one recollects having seen him. Which is probably for the best. “CC” my guide in this told me two important things; 1) It would cost me “fiddy” to have an answer, and 2) If one yelled at him anymore, he was going to kill me, and dump my body in an alley. Good to know. The answer, as best one can determine is that one should take my freak self out of there as soon as possible. So, one takes that to mean, “No sign of Zen Blade”.


So called “Tea Party Gangs of Old White People” are really getting out of hand, and will have to be handled. Negotiation, for the record, does not appear to be a successful stratagem. Mockery though, sends a light beam of absurdist joy into one’s heart. The fact that most of them are armed to the teeth and “ready to go” (to heaven) should not in anyway bring fear to innocent bystanders caught in any crossfires.

Still looking unsuccessfully for a way to exploit and export Radon, which exists in abundance in the very soil upon which one treads, and in the air one breathes.

The Unnamed Horror that dwells beneath the Denver International Airport continues to sleep, as it has all these many years. Therefore, the future opportunity for apocalypse appears to be well managed. Always extending a malevolent ‘thank you’ to the tireless work of the Phoebus Cartel for their work on ones behalf (though they have not seen fit to accept ones application to their august body).

In ones absence Ghost of Nixon had an opportunity to flak trolls, and your reviews of his efforts are welcomed and appreciated. Please take a moment to answer the survey in the upper right hand corner. Of course, as an Evil Blog, w/an Evil Survey, cheating is allowed. Training the next generation of Villains is a responsibility one takes as duty.

Instrument of Evil: Today, 12 days remain until The Next Pepsi Challenge. One is gearing up to engage this opportunity to assault the weakness of good. Think: "Vote: Villainy".

The Great Shadow: As a gifted eccentric (so called “Insane Megalomaniac”) one has been accused of being too great, and casting too large a shadow for the works of others to flourish. As a responsible villain, one calls this omnipresence “The Great Shadow”. While one was away for the Accounting, how has Evil flourished?

Agent Beryllium excelled to new heights with the inspired brilliance we have come to expect, including a Crusade to reinstate Pluto to its rightful place in the planetary pantheon.

The Destructive Kitchen, continues to improve and intrigue. What conundrums will be expounded upon, what secrets revealed?

Poop Knife has been in the trenches, bringing common sense to the senseless ninnies of good. Possibly the most incisive, critical thinking blog out there, for those in the Villain business. Including ones own… Curses!

The Artist Formerly Known as Grodd, (now known as Vandalor) has built and is continuing to develop a Blogtalk Radio show. If Call In time can be arranged, one would like to dial in on the next show. If no time can be arranged in advance, one will try and dial in ~2115 Mountain Standard Time. Gifted eccentrics can be quirky...

The Return of Legend: Crimson Nematode posted, and if you have never partaken of posts so Evil, so ruthless, so absurd, so fun, you have not yet lived as Evil.

Russell Hants continues to champion the cause of Evil on Survivor. The heroes, like heroes, are losing, as they always must.

The Scarlet Fool has been seen about, here and there, gracing those fortunate few by his insight. If you have been so favored, consider yourself acknowledged by a Master of Evil.

The volume and quality of the work is superior, and continues to improve. If anyone has not been mentioned, you have one’s sincere apologies. The Lair is not yet quite up to speed, as one continues unpacking the Malignosedan from the voyages.


Where is Bob? One believes Bob is heading East, despite rumors to the contrary. While one cannot be sure, it is possible to track Bob. One is watching for descriptions of “creepy, black robe, red hair, smelly” to find him. Apparently in 1975, Bob was in Idaho (check “Cults).

What is Go Go Maligno! and why didn’t one find out about this earlier? Is it real, or is it parody of my magnificence? One cannot be sure, and will instead believe it to be devotional. Being not the least bit paranoid (gifted eccentric), one will monitor their activities. Dare one say, “Welcome!”?

-Lord Malignance